Living with an invisible Chronic Condition - by Rosanne Caruana - for the Successlodge Community

Most people in my opinion, think that all chronic conditions are visible, but this is not the fact.

There are many different chronic conditions that are invisible, like Fibromyalgia, M.E (myalgic encephalomyelitis), CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) and many more, but today I am only going to write about Fibromyalgia.

The name fibromyalgia comes from the Latin word 'fibro' which means fibrous tissues referring for tendons & ligaments, 'my' means muscles and 'algia' means pain.
I would like to share with you my personal experience and how a person feels when having an invisible chronic condition. I would also like to bring up more awareness on these conditions, especially Fibromyalgia.

As a person who has this condition myself, I can say it`s not easy to live with, especially when it has to do with pain and fatigue, which varies from mild to moderate and moderate to severe. At times this will leave you disabled and unable to maintain your daily routine, like holding a mug, brushing your hair, able to maintain a full time or part time job, taking frequent sick leave, at times it can leave you bedbound and much more problems, which we as sufferers encounter in our daily lives.

No one really knows the exact cause of fibromyalgia and research into this cause is still being done. The three major symptoms are: widespread musculoskeletal pain and stiffness, fatigue and trouble sleeping. There are more than other fifty symptoms, which vary from a person to another. Muscle, ligament and tendon stiffness become prone to spasm.

A person with fibromyalgia is very sensitive to touch. Being touched is a sensation for most persons, but in fibromyalgia sufferers, touch means pain. Anyone can develop fibromyalgia, although the condition affects more women than men. It occurs between the ages of 35-60, but it can develop in people of any age, including children and the elderly. It is common in woman but there are men who have this condition as well.

There is no cure for fibromyalgia, but treatment can and may ease the symptoms. A sufferer can treat this condition by a combination of medical treatment, complementary therapies and lifestyle changes. As we are all different, even in this condition treatment has to be done on an individual basis. What is good for a person, it`s not always good for another.

Symptoms may sometimes get better or worse, depending on certain factors which can bring up a flare up of this condition, like stress, bereavement, broken relationships, trauma, after an operation, changes in weather and more.

Persons, who have fibromyalgia, are unlikely that the condition will ever resolve permanently, although there may be a period of time when symptoms lessens. Most people have to learn to live with the condition long-term. However, fibromyalgia is not life-threatening and does not reduce life expectancy.

Being an active person, working long hour shifts, having a social life, never makes you think that due to this condition, all this has to change; you have to change your lifestyle. When you start feeling pain, muscle stiffness and/or spasms, fatigue which worsen if you don`t rest and at times it won`t even go by rest, finding it difficult to sleep, difficulty concentrating (fibro fog), chronic headaches, IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), TMJ (temporomandibular joint dysfunction) together with many other symptoms, leaves you unable to keep your normal daily activities.

Partners, relatives, friends and colleagues don`t understand what it really feels like, being in pain, feel fatigue, because we look normal, but inside we suffer a lot and sometimes in silence. All this will make it more difficult for us sufferers to find support in those persons around us. On the other hand these persons need support too and they need to be aware more of this condition. In some cases psychological support is needed for sufferers, partners and relatives.

I always say that I want to be understood and don`t want others around me to feel sorry for me, this will make things worse. I want to be positive and if I am surrounded by persons who are negative, it will make my positive thinking go down. With all the respect, I would like and try not to pay attention to these persons, but after all I am human and a caring person!

Having this condition for more than eight years has changed my life a lot; I needed to change my lifestyle, tried different medical treatments but not all has effect and if pain subsides for some time, tried to avoid medicine as much as possible due to the side effects. I don`t wish to have more problems but prefer avoiding them if I can! In the last eight years I also experimented with different therapies like; hydrotherapy, acupuncture, physiotherapy, massages, gentle exercises and more. Normally massages are really very helpful, but due to financial problems I could not have them on a regular basis.

I will to continue to try and experiment different complimentary therapies, until I feel better and better.

After sharing my experience, I can tell you that since I was diagnosed of having fibromyalgia, I passed from a lot of stress, bereavements and other health problems. Having all this made my symptoms worse because I was having regular flare ups. But I didn`t stop there, but continued to look forward in a positive way, asking for professional help when I needed it. All this make me grow more and I feel stronger than before. Life is fragile, but we all need to have positive thinking in all situations, I know it`s not easy.

By moaning all the time will only makes your life and those around you in a heavy and negative environment. Come on, we need to breath!
I don`t want to be a victim, I want to be a Survivor!

Resist, Owner of myself, Self confidence, Assertiveness, Nice thoughts, No to negativity
  Empoweredwith positivity

If you suffer with chronic pain, we suggest 11 Chronic Pain eBooks

written by Rosanne Caruana
for the Successlodge Community
www.successlodge.com

Dealing with an Eating Disorder - by Stephanie Camilleri - for the Successlodge Community

Allow me to introduce myself.. My name is Stephanie Camilleri and I suffer from an eating disorder. I have been ‘clean’ for 2 months now and I would like to share my experience.. how my dream became reality.
Whenever people would ask me what my dreams and ambitions were, I used to panic. I would invent an answer.. travel, raise a family, career, anything to shut them up but I knew exactly what dream was.. to be free from my eating disorder. My whole life revolved around it. It was the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the last thing I thought about before I slept. Unknowingly I was killing myself both physically, mentally and spirituality. I knew I couldn’t live like this but my eating disorder was in total control of my life. I would read success stories on the subject..

I was so envious I would cry myself to sleep, thinking I was weak and there was no way out. I felt guilty and shameful. How could I have lost the plot in this way? My life seemed to be over, then one day I hit rock bottom, I moved to Montreal 6 months before this day and I just wanted to pack up and leave, run away from my eating disorder, move back home to my family and friends to my comfort zone.

And then… the little voice inside of me remembered my dream TO BE FREE FROM MY EATING DISORDER. All of a sudden I stopped and spoke to myself, I spoke to Stephanie. I told myself, God put me on this earth, he created me, I need to take care of myself. I can do this. I decided to take the reigns again. I knew it was going to be hard but I was determined to live.. and to live fully – body, mind and spirit.
The first thing I did was seek professional help. I also decided that I really need to be honest with all the people who were important to me, my family, my friends, my co-workers. This was scary. The feelings of guilt and shame that come along with this eating disorder are incredible, but once I opened up to everybody I was surprised at how understanding everybody was. Not only did I get positive responses but they now had some light on why I acted the way I did.
Opening up to people was a whole new experience. By opening up I started to hear my own voice, I felt like layers were slowly being peeled off. And to my amazement I realized I like myself. I am definitely not perfect but hey I like myself. It’s amazing ghow when you accept yourself the way you are , the world just pens up to you.
I have made peace with myself, and God. I am grateful for this precious life. Life is too beautiful to wither away. Although I cannot undo the past, I have learnt from it. Strangely enough, I am happy I suffer from an eating disorder (I use the present tense because it is still a daily battle) because everyday I fight it, and every day I am more appreciative of my new life.. or more precisely my new attitude towards life. My new life is filled with dreams, friendships, love, joy, sadness, laughter, crying..
One of my assignments for my therapy sessions was to make a magic wand and write down my dream. This was my what I wrote (plus I made a fancy wand too!):
I, Stephanie, want to be REAL
R – rediscover life
E – Energetic
A – Attitude of gratitude
L – Live life to the fullest
My dream is now reality. I am focused and determined to be REAL. The road isn’t always going to a straight one, but those bumps and curves all serve as life learning experiences. Life is beautiful. I’m actually in love with life. Achieveing my dream has lead to joy, peace and happiness within myself.
Dreams can turn into reality! I hope that through my experience you too realise that whatever dreams you have, no matter how big or small, you can achieve it. It will change your life! Go for it.. it’s worth it.

Thanks for listening.

Stephanie Camilleri, Malta


Learn how to deal with an eating disorder
Anorexia Bulimia Recovery - Eating Disorders Treatment Book.

www.successlodge.com

Law of Attraction by Maria Stivala, Successlodge Associate

 

Maria Stivala,    Using Neuro Linguistic Programing

Ever since I discovered NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), life started to make sense. Now, for everything I am experiencing there seems to be an explanation. I understand that whatever I am experiencing in my life, I have been attracted there - like a magnet. I have drawn in these things by virtue of the images that I hold in my mind- my thoughts, says Maria Stivala. People often talk about time management, but they don't think about 'mental' management. We underestimate the role that thoughts play in our lives. We put aside thoughts that express our feelings to our loved ones, and instead waste our energy worrying about what is not working in the relationship. Whatever it is we think about, we are bound to attract it into our life, and love is no exception. If we are focusing on how bad our partner is making us feel and how empty our relationship is, guess what? That is what we are going to get more of. The moment we start measuring what we are not getting, we step out of love and into fear, anger and resentment. That's right, we all work with this one infinite power. We abide with one universal law; it is the Law of Attraction. By shifting negative thoughts, we can literally transform our relationship into a happier one. You will start attracting good things into your love life once you programme your mind to focus on the things you want in your relationship rather than what you do not want. For instance, “I want my partner to comprehend what my dreams and passions are” rather than, “my partner doesn't get me, he/she does not care what my passions are”. Without exception, the law of attraction works every time. It is important that we keep reminding ourselves of how lucky we are. Look around and cherish the love. Look at your partner in the eye and smile, remind yourself that your soul mate is right next to you. Remind each other of what brought you two together and ultimately, what is keeping you together. NLP puts people in the right frame of mind in order to translate negativity into thoughts of gratitude and positivity. So what is NLP anyway? Neuro Linguistic Programming is an attitude, a methodology, and a technology that teaches people how to improve their quality of life. It is an educational tool that teaches us how to communicate more effectively within ourselves and with others. It is a structure of how we think, and how we experience the world. Richard Bandler (the co-creator of NLP) sums up this exercise as the “ Falling More in Love” Pattern in his most recent book Get the life you want: 1. Close your eyes and think of your loved one. 2. Remember the first time that you fell in love with them. Imagine it like it was yesterday. See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel what you felt at that very moment. Spin those feelings inside your body. 3.Now, think of anything that bothers you about your partner. Make a mental image, as if looking through your eyes but seeing only them in the picture. 4.Immediately bring up all the memories of times where you loved being with them and step into those images, but this time, you are seeing yourself with your partner and experiencing what you saw and feeling what you felt at that time. 5.Run through all these wonderful experiences and amplify the feeling of love and spin it throughout your body. 6.Now open your eyes and look at your loved one. Notice yourself feeling like you did the first time you fell for them. Take the opportunity to rekindle the magic this Valentine's day. Give the best gift of all, the gift of love and passion. After all, it really is the thought that counts!

www.successlodge.com

Grandmother's prayer to life- written by my Mum (Denise Camilleri)

“Come on children, get up brush your teeth and wash your face, it's already eight o'clock and we have to go to mass at ten.”

“I want to stay in bed, it's so cosy, I get up early all week, why do I have to wake up just because you want to go to church.”

That is how it was every Sunday morning; the rush to the bathroom, breakfast, shiny shoes, a veil on my head and off we went to mass. Generally, by the time we got there, my grandmother was already in the front pew, her little hat perched on her head and her rosary beads rolling in between her fingers.

Mass was standard routine for me, I would sit and listen to a priest drone on about how great (or not) our religion was, how much Jesus loved us or to what extent he suffered for us. This always confused me immensely, I could never understand if Jesus was actually cross with me or if he loved me unconditionally. As time went along, I was told that I would be doing my first holy communion and that my parents would be throwing a party in my honour. I was thrilled! Sweets and presents both sounded like a great idea. I always secretly wondered however how my grandmother managed to smile throughout these religious services; she never seemed bored or fidgety but always exhumed a sense of peace and tranquillity.

As time passed I started to understand better her life philosophies. After mass every Sunday, my entire extended family and I would normally go for lunch at her house for as long as I can remember. Everybody gathered around a big table talking and enjoying her Sunday roast or stuffed chicken. I also remember the fact that we were forced to go through all our vegetables even if we didn’t quite like them if we wanted desert after lunch. The highlight of these Sunday lunches came after that though, we would all gather around my grandma who would relate various childhood stories of hers to us.

To me she was a wise old woman, we would ask her all sorts of questions and she always had a reply for us. My staple question generally focused around mass and Jesus; why was it so boring and why did we have to attend mass every single week. One day she decided to share her secret with me.

My grandma had had a very difficult childhood, her mother had passed away when she was still a baby and her father, being unable to cope with the family had given her up to be fostered. Eventually she became a teacher and met a man who was much older than her, he took her out, and spoiled her, for the first time she felt as though everything she had missed out on in life up till now was coming her way; champagne, beautiful dresses, laughter and dancing. However all that glitters is not gold and her dream life soon came to a sharp halt when her boyfriend was involved in a fatal road accident.

This tragedy cost her a year in hospital, and she was told that she would never walk again. In her opinion, this was one of God’s many tests of faith.. My grandma admitted to not having been particularly religious at the time, and had not gone to church for years. Being bed-ridden for two months gave her ample time to reflect on her life, her past and her relationship with God. Gradually she began laying her faith in Christ and her patron saint, St. Anne by praying more and having complete and absolute faith in their mercy.


Even though there appeared to be no physical improvement, her spirits lifted a little more each day as she was convinced that her faith would save her, and that she would be able to overcome this period in her life and walk again someday. Her faith was strong and eventually she started walking again, amazing both medical staff and family members.

After this incident her life changed completely, she met my grandfather and they started a family together. Her faith remained strong and she made it a point never to skip a mass or miss out on saying the rosary. She admitted that God had placed further challenges throughout her life path, however she never gave up or doubted her faith. According to her, feeling close to God made her feel safe.

Nowadays I am a mother myself and am able to appreciate her wisdom further and cherish her memory forever in my heart. I finally understand the beautiful gift of love she left me.
Thank you grandma for understanding how I felt as a child, for guiding me in the right path and teaching me how to love, respect and honour life and our Creator.
www.successlodge.com

A green land project idea - by Claude Camilleri

Yesterday was an amazing day, a time of reflection and positive thought.

I packed up my cooler, my fold-able chair and my hammock. Put everything in my car along with my good pal, Milo, my dog and headed to Riviera, a spot in Malta which brings me serenity and re-energizes me.

I got their before my friends. I tied my hammock up and laid down for a while.

The sea breeze came up the steep hills and blew fresh air into my nostrils. I took long deep breathes, visualized the beauty and enjoyed the silence.

Soon my friends came along and enjoyed the surroundings. The moment was bliss. Peaceful.

Whilst absorbing the true beauty of nature, a few big birds flew over us. This was amazing. Amazing because our island has had an unfortunate battle against hunters for many years now, they hunted most of the seasons. Luckily these days, laws have been kinder to the birds, thus the enjoyment to my eyes.

Not long after this spectacle, my friend Sandro, picked up a rock. This rock consisted of stone, salt crystals and sand. I spent at least twenty minutes gazing at its raw beauty. I am not a geologist ,but I can definitely say this rock was thousands of years old.

So there I was completely relaxed, free and happy. As I took in all the energy that surrounded me, a past idea came to my mind.

My idea is to find a huge area of green land in Malta (Green land in Malta is an area where people cannot build buildings) and buy it using funds from everyone. The land, which will be sold per meter square, will give the buyer a piece of their island, a contribution to nature.

(please note, green land continues to be taken from the community, and since we are an island we only have so much land).

I have contributed to many causes, yet, I have never set one up myself. If any of you have hands on experience here, please send me a message, lets make this idea happen. It will take years to get all the money for the land, but I am ready to take a step each day like I am sure many of you are.

Be part of the project where ever you live. Mother nature is for us all. Take one minute of your time to try our POLL, this is to find a name for this project, step one.

Written by Claude Camilleri,
Master NLP Practitioner, Malta
founder of Successlodge
www.successlodge.com

If you have had hands on experience on starting up a project like this, please e mail claude.camilleri@successlodge.com

is NLP FOR YOU ?

What if I told you that by learning NLP you could reprogram your mind to achieve specific results ?

What if I told you that by learning NLP you could apply positive change in the areas that need change?

Would you decide to become an NLP Practitioner ?

Read on and find out “NLP IS FOR YOU” :

This is a generalization, but I could be pretty sure, that many of us have a few things we would personally like to change.

You see, NLP is a methodology that can help you fine tune yourself.

Imagine you had a list of all your habits, good or not so good. and as you go through your list you tell yourself,

mmhh “need a bit more confidence,
need to be more organized,
need to get things done,
need to learn how to be happy”... and the list goes on and on.

NLP works ? By becoming an NLP Practitioner you are given a handful of tools. Once you practice these tools you will feel, see and hear things differently and
POSITIVE CHANGE WILL HAPPEN.

Lets say your belief is “I am never happy”, how can an NLP Practitioner help you.

They would find out a time when you were happy, get in your mind (so to speak) and make that happy memory even more appealing, exciting. They would then anchor that feeling either auditory (hearing) kin-esthetically (feeling) or visually.

Once the anchor is in place they would make you remember a time when you felt unhappy, and distort the memory and place the happy anchor. This will confuse your minds and that unhappy memory (which you could still remember)will feel, sound and look differently, it will have a whole new meaning.

This can help people who are mourning a loved one many years after the loved ones death, to move on without feeling guilty. It can help people who have had abusive pasts.

NLP IS LIFE CHANGING

I have seen amazing transformation with my clients, most in one or two sessions.

NLP IS FOR YOU :

By learning NLP you can do stuff that you might have thought was impossible, like Public Speaking, getting over your fear of heights and so much more.

If you are disorganized. You are probably using the same method for your work, wardrobe even car. This disorganization could cost you time, energy and money. By using NLP techniques, you can find out your exact formula and change your formula to the way you like it.

This is great for shopaholics, people who cannot save a dime. I worked with a shopaholic, a compulsive buyer, who literally bought anything that made her feel good. This had an effect on her finance, so it was a change she wanted to tackle. In less then 30 minutes, her old formula was replaced by her new and better formula.

so is NLP FOR YOU ?

Written by Claude Camilleri,
Master NLP Practitioner, Malta
founder of Successlodge
www.successlodge.com